(¯`·._.·§ka_Man·._.·´¯)

Ska Man emailed and sent a friends request on Steam to me.


Click and be amazed.

you heard wrong

newb

HELLO HOW ARE YOU?

I fail at backstabs

I seriously fail at being a spy. I was cloaked, with my knife in hand and I came up behind a heavy. My hand goes up in the backstab pose, and click my mouse button. Nothing. Just sits there. I'm never being a spy again.

Thanks for the fun!

Last night was fun times.

Red Assfault

West Virginia: guns, trees and sparse population.

There are a few things that I don’t like about the state of West Virginia: The crazy backwoods fuckers, the average weight of the female population, burning couches… It has also become apparent that no one knows how to tie knots or use bungee cords correctly there. But, I’ll get to that in a second.

There are a few things that I really like about West Virginia: The crazy backwoods fuckers (you can get lots of fun illegal stuff from them), beautiful mountain landscapes and well kept highways. The New river is a wonderful place to white water raft. It also boasts one of the most popular bridges to commit suicide off of in the entire world. I can respect a place where the right to life is exercised on a regular basis.

But, my very favorite thing about West Virginia is the 70 mile per hour speed limit.

Today I was driving through West Virginia, enjoying the scenery, doing 80 miles per hour in the family Kia, singing along to my new Kelly Clarkson cd and daydreaming about what the secret of monkey island might be when I moved into the passing lane behind a large truck. This apparently was a member of the aforementioned population who do not know how to fasten things to even a stationary object let alone a moving a vehicle.

At about three car lengths behind said truck it was difficult to ignore a large box fall off the back and onto the four lane highway in front of me. When I say large, I mean that this thing probably contained a stove or a small refrigerator at some point.

There are two outcomes to this story, either I am dead and visiting this interwebial plane in the form of a ghost who eternally has poop in his pants, or I am putting in applications as a stunt driver in the next Nicholas Cage film.

Either way, I think I’ll be riding my bicycle for the next few days.

Recent Mcfeters Family Spotting.

The elusive supervillain Mcfeters (center) spotted with his wife (left) and son (right).

Kyle Phillips Will Pay - part 2

more Mass Effect

I'm on my second run-through of Mass Effect. I love this game. I'm going to have to say that it is my second favorite rpg, behind the Final Fantasy games.

I love you.

Happy Sunday.

Kyle Phillips will pay

You won't get away with this.

Shane Morris Time Machine - part 4

:(

Loom

Loom is a Lucasarts text/point and click adventure game that was released in 1991. I got Loom when it came out. I was five years old. Yes Rob, you are an old man. It came with this really nice manual that had spaces for you to write notes in and stuff. A few years ago I downloaded the game and some emulators and replayed it. It really held up. The story and the way it is told is great. The gameplay is unique and requires some thought. I highly recommend this game if you have five dollars and some time to waste. Careful, it requires 2 MB of video RAM.



Loom

Jake

The most elite of gamers, they call him "JAKE".

Borgeau and I were graced with his presence only just days ago. It was the experience of a lifetime and a schooling in the ways of gaming and smack talk. Jake is only five years old and he's already railed more pussy than you could ever dream of. At age three, he crossed the Rio Grande and made his way to America. He left behind only two dead border patrol officers and his cowering family (a wife and newborn son) whom he had reportedly told to "shut up" in such a jarring tone that they were both left deaf and blind.

He remains a mystery to this day. I am currently investigating several usernames after trying to add him to my own friends list to see if he isn't using some sort of alias. A man like him must lay low, after all. He gets a lot of heat for being the best at everything ever.

Needless to say, that night was the best night of my life.

I'm going to contact him, once found, I'm going to see if we can't make this elite gamer part of the most elite gaming clan in existence,


DKG

I like fire.

Every year for the fourth I go over to my childhood friend's house. His family has a lot of money. Anyway, we had 5000 dollars worth of fireworks. We still have stuff left over from three years ago. It was fun. Here are some pictures.

Sinking Ships - "kiss the sharks"

I have two best friends in the worlds. The following video is from one their bands:


incredibly adorable

Last night

I played L4D with my son. It was glorious.

I have a resume

I am a real man

This is why cats rule:

CLICK HERE!

IAAT profile: Dolderer

1. How old were you when you took your first dump?
I would really rather not talk about this. I don't think many of you know this, but when I was young my father was quite the rapscallion. That may be the wrong word to use. His hobbies included raping and pillaging. He would take me along on "raids" with his "guild of warriors" and sometimes present me as a peace offering to the "helpless savages" as he would put it. Of course this was all a ruse so he could rape as many of their men as possible. I remember seeing his engorged member throb through his latex pantleg, saliva dripping from the side of his mouth as he readied his axe. For whatever reason, he always forced me to remove all of the villager’s shirts after dousing them with buckets of water. Sorry, I am getting off track here. I was about twelve years old when we were making nice with a group of men over some tea before the rape ritual. All the sudden I heard my father scream, "UNNNNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGHHHHHH. FURRRRRRRRRGGGG. What the fuck is in this shit?!" The leader of men stood up and said, "Not this time." Soon enough my father and his men were spraying gloopy streams of greenish-brown shit all over the room. A room full of teeth-gnashing, loud grunts, heavy breathing, and piercing screams. That’s when I felt it. I fell to the fetal position and began convulsing wildly. Streams of stinky shit sprayed out of my ass onto the wall. Curiously, it formed a stencil outline of Will Smith's head. Anyway, the tribesmen proceeded to shove all their asses into my father's ass. It was after this episode that he left the guild, settled down in Seattle, and became a high society homosexual and an IT professional.

2. Have you accidentally the whole thing?
My name is Yomungry Ruisinstrude. Let me show you who I am.

3. OWNED!
Toes are cold, Haha My

4. What was the first game that made you ragequit and what happened to make you act like a big fucking baby?
I'm not sure. It must have been Sonic The Hedgehog 2 on Sega Genesis. I had a Commodore 64 computer before that, but I was really young and don't remember ever ragequitting. Sonic 2 was the first game I had for Sega and I played the hell out of it. I'm sure I rage quit on Oil Ocean.

5. What are your thoughts on shirtless men hugging?
It reminds me of my father.

6. Would you ever show your ass to your own ass? Why?


7. If you were Gordon Freeman for one day, what would you do?
Let me just say once the day ended I would kill myself because there would be nothing else worth living for. I will have reached the pinnacle of existence. First I would make love to Alyx. Then a vortigaunt. Of course I would save tender Eli for last (RIP). I wouldn't go to Ravenholm because we don't go to Ravenholm. I'd shit myself inside a particle accelerator causing another Resonance Cascade and transporting me to Xen. Dr. Breen would be there kissing a shirtless G-Man. After making my way back to Earth, I'd hijack a Combine Helicopter and fly to Tulsa to use my suped up gravity gun on Kyle Phillips while he is taking a shower.

8. How extreme are you?
This one time I worked a 9 to 5 corporate office job where I put papers in order for an entire summer. Oh, that's right now. I have blasted Young Jeezy while driving through a bad neighborhood. I enjoy playing Risk. In a little more than a month and one week I'll have my hands inside of a dead person's chest cavity.

9. Do you agree that the Engineer is a credit to the team?
Quite possibly my favorite character. Or second favorite. I love that game. I wonder if they would make TF3? You can't really make new classes. New characters and a new graphical style? No Thanks. Maps and game modes can just be added to TF2. Hm.

10. Tell the story about the first time you kissed a man:
There's an app for that.